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I'M SORRY I NEVER GOT TO TELL YOU
DOUG (a confused teenager) SIMON (Doug's insensitive friend) DAD (a business man)
(Lights on to reveal a park bench. DOUG walks in slowly, and slumps down on the bench, looking pretty downhearted.)
SIMON (strides in exuberantly) Busted!!! 'Dougie the Druggie' - how are ya man? I thought you were staying at my joint tonight. Joint - get it? Ha! Ha!
DOUG Real funny, Simon.
SIMON Seriously, are you staying tonight or what?
DOUG Na, Mate - I've gotta get my head together before my Mum and Dad get back. Tell your Olds my Mum and Dad came back early or something.
SIMON Can you believe that old fart going off his rocker at you today. I don't know what's worse, man, being sprung or being shamed in front of your mates. That old jerk! What would he know? (imitating teacher) "How can a person of your upbringing even consider trying marijuana. I thought substance-abuse was for brainless-no-hopers who don't care about their lives."
DOUG That'll do.
SIMON Oh, you'll be alright, mate. I just can't believe it was you who got caught. You didn't even want to try the stuff. Sucked in!! Have you seen the pigs yet?
DOUG No! That'll be tomorrow when Mum and Dad get back.
SIMON Glad it's you and not me. I'd rather be dead than have to face my parents over a drug charge.
DOUG Knowing your luck, you'll never need to.
SIMON Anyway mate, I'm out-ta here. See you tomorrow. (jogs out)
DOUG Yeah maybe! (now left on his own) Yeah! You can laugh. Your parents have never really cared what you do anyway....It's gonna kill my Dad when he finds out...Ah well...there goes the law career...I didn't want to do that anyway...but then again, that's just one of many things I didn't want to do...My life's just pointless now... I've spent so many years trying to be something for Mum and Dad, and when they find out this, I'll be nothing in their eyes...John was always the favourite...I was never going to be as good as him. Anyway, this'll be the last straw. All those times Dad pulled me up and said I wasn't making the grade...always comparing me to my 'wonder-brother' John...Well I've proven him right now....I haven't made the grade. How's my Dad going to face his friends now; having a druggie for a son...I guess I was destined to be a failure...some make it, and some don't...I just can't keep trying any more...It'd be different if Dad could accept me for who I really am, but I'm too scared to show him the real me...Mum's going to be shattered... What can I do?...Maybe Simon's right...I'd be better dead than facing failure for the rest of my life. (gets up after a pause, and starts leaving slowly) This world sure as hell doesn't need another loser littering the place.
(Lights dim as music is playing. After a pause, lights come up slowly as Dad enters.)
DAD (speaking with a mixture of emotions) Two weeks ago, my son took his life...I can't believe it...I just can't believe it! How can someone with so much going for him...my son...that terrific kid...just end it all...blow himself off the face of the planet...no reason...what a waste...what a loss...my loss...our loss...the school's loss...the world's loss. Doug, I don't know what you were thinking...to choose death rather than facing us over something as small as being caught using drugs... Please God, there has to be more to it than that...Why did you do it, son?...Did you really think your life was that worthless?...I'm such a fool...If only I could bring you back, as a baby, and start it all over again...Tell you what I really felt about you...that I was proud of you from the day I met you...a little bundle of life in your mother's arms...I knew you could make it...I expected it...I demanded it...Yeah, I demanded a lot from you, didn't I?...I didn't really find out what you wanted...I didn't find out who you were...We never knew each other...How stupid to put on our masculine masks and pretend everything was all right. What an ego trip to want to make you into something you didn't want to be, just so I could parade your success as a proud father...Well there's certainly no pride now...just emptiness, loneliness and a longing to see you again. (After a pause.) Well son,...I know this is too late...but this is what I really wanted to say to you. You've always been a very special part of my life...I know things didn't come as naturally to you as John, and we seemed to often rub each other the wrong way, but there's something about you that's irreplaceable...it's hard to put a finger on it...Was it the soft streak buried underneath that hard exterior?...The resistance to conformity?...The scheming mind I could never understand?...I guess it's just...that there's no one quite like you. You're Doug...my son, Doug...You're priceless...I love you...not for what you could do, or who I thought you could become...just because you're you. (A further pause.) You're Doug...and you meant the world to me... I'm sorry I never got to tell you.
BLACK OUT
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